Need some perspective on a relationship situation that went completely wrong
So this whole mess started when my partner heard about his buddy getting “trapped” into marriage by an unplanned pregnancy. His friend’s girlfriend had secretly stopped birth control early in their relationship and got pregnant, only telling him the truth after they got married. Since the friend comes from a traditional family, he felt he had to do the right thing and marry her.
This story really got into my husband’s head. We’ve been together for seven years and I’m currently expecting our first child at four months along. Out of nowhere, he confronted me asking if I was trying to trap him with this baby. I actually laughed at first because it seemed so ridiculous - we’ve been married all this time and this pregnancy was something we both wanted and planned for almost a year.
But he was completely serious about his suspicions. When I tried to point out that we were already married and had been trying to conceive, he got even more upset. He said my reaction proved I wasn’t trustworthy and that there was no timeline on when someone could use a baby to manipulate their partner.
The next morning he was gone. I woke up to nasty messages from his family members blaming me for forcing him into this situation, even though the pregnancy was a mutual decision we made together. He wouldn’t answer my calls or texts and just disappeared completely.
That’s when I realized how angry I should be about this whole situation. A close friend’s husband who works in family law offered to help me with divorce paperwork. When my mother-in-law found out what happened, she dragged my husband back to apologize, but he could barely look at me and just mumbled about being scared of fatherhood.
I told him he needed to stay elsewhere while I figured things out. Found out we’re having a daughter, which suddenly made him want to come back and be involved. But by then I had already decided I couldn’t trust someone who would abandon me when things got challenging. The divorce papers were served at his workplace, and despite his crying voicemails, I know I’m making the right choice for me and my baby.